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Basics of Model Choice

The simplest way to narrow the packer model of best fit is to pick a general size first, then a shape. Although there is contradictory literature sometimes documenting a correlation between dick size and height, one of the most frequently asked questions when choosing a model is, "I'm a <insert vertical size/ height here> person who is <describe width, weight, etc here>. Which packer would look the most natural?"

However, if you want help making a proportionate decision, never fear, for Gramma is queer and has no damn idea, which is not helpful. Here's a chart, however, of average flaccid size, in which only length is accounted for unfortunately. 

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What may help narrow your decision is for Granny to break these bad boys down by size groups: Mini, modest, average, large, and the Kentucky Hot DAMN. These account for the values of shaft Length and girth. Evaluating for scrotal volume may be a future endevour, as most data only looks at shaft dimensions.

Groups

  • Mini is significantly smaller than the average flaccid penis, but moreso in girth than length.  Some may use the term "micropenis," but technically a micropenis is properly measured at stretched length, in which skin and silicone do not have the same properties to compare. (A micropenis is stretched penile length equal to or less than 9.3 cm (3.67 in) in adults, but often does not account for girth.). People who generally choose this size are generally packing stealth (pre-t and not out yet, for example) or simply for their own enjoyment. Some people enjoy the sensory aspect of packing, particularly with softer silicones. Additionally, softer silicones tend to work great for foreplay for the wearer of the prosthesis. Included in this category are the Vienna, the Beanie Weenie, and the Metawurst. Gramma traditionally has not done F3 models in the Vienna or Beanie Weenie due to their sizing, but she’s rethinking this after quite a bit of nudging from customers, and Granny comes from a time where the customer has always been right (if such an item can be made at good quality). ;)

 

 

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Included in this grouping are the Vienna, Beanie Weenie, and The Metawurst (3D scrote optional).

  • Modest is the next size up (although Gramma would argue that these guys are completely within the average range for an adult male’s flaccid weinersausage). This sizing is more of a girth increase than significant length increases. This increase in girth puts this group into the adult male range, with the length being comparable to the mini packers. A bulge will certainly be noticeable in some pants, but is completely obscured in most pants. These models are, in Gramma’s opinion, the best of all worlds. They work great for a beginner getting used to something being in the pants, they go great in a speedo, they are great for hitting the gym, going on dates, and seem to be a slam dunk for interviews (Gramma lives vicariously through all of you - anything you accomplish whilst strapped with a sausage, hit up Granny’s hotline just for fun. <3)

Included in this grouping are the BRUHwurst (cut and uncut), Knobelwurst, and KOCHwurst. Of these models, the BRUHwurst (cut) and the KOCHwurst have 3D scrotum options.

  • Average models are significantly larger than the modest grouping, although you will feel it more than others will notice. You can often switch between modest and average sized bulges without anyone really noticing, but if you’ve packed before especially and you want a regular ol’ bulge, pick a guy in this group. If you're new to packing, Granny recommends something a bit smaller, but you don't always have to listen to Gramma. ;)

Included in this grouping are the Andoilini, Andoillette, Hungarian Kolbasz (aka "Kolby"), Liverwurst Cut, and the Liverwurst Uncut.

  • Significantly Above Average are significantly above the average bulge size, though not considered statistical outliers technically speaking (aka 2 standard deviations from the average flaccid cis penis, though girth and scrotum size is generally not accounted for when talking about straight up weiner stats).  These guys all have the ability to look ‘normal’ or ‘wow, he is hung!’ depending on what one wears.

Included in this grouping are Big Scrotum Sally (aka "Big Sal" or "Sal"), the Chorizo (sometimes known as "Charlie"), the Frankfurter (aka "Frank"), and the Oscar Minor (aka "Oscar").

If you want a big scrote, pick Big Sal (she’s around 4” long, but is girthy and has a big, beautiful scrotum) or the Chorizo (he is actually around average shaft length, but has a scrote around Sal’s size as well, sort of the “uncut” Sal of the group). If you want a longer shaft and less scroteage, pick Frank. If you want something a bit above average (but too big to fit into the “average” group, pick Oscar. 

  • Kentucky Hot DAMN 

These guys are fucking HUNG. It’s humanly possible to have a bulge of this magnitude, but exceedingly rare. That being said, if you’re wearing baggy pants, it’s doubtful anyone will notice either way. This guy is for people who like to pack a punch or add a couple pounds when they go to the doctor! The Cervelot is technically a pack n' play, but we offer him as a Basic packer also - he does the helicopter quite well. The Brot does not. :P 

Sausage Specs

View specific specs and dimensions for all packer models

Vienna FTM packer specs and dimensions
Beanie Weenie FTM packer specs and dimensions
Metawurst FTM packer specs and dimensions
bruhwurst FTM packer specs and dimensions
BRUHwurst UNCUT FTM packer specs and dimensions
knobelwurst FTM packer specs and dimensions
liverwurst FTM packer specs and dimensions
FTM packer specs and dimensions
kochwurst FTM packer specs and dimensions
liverwurst uncut FTM packer specs and dimensions
andoilini FTM packer specs and dimensions
KOLBY FTM packer specs and dimensions
oscar minor FTM packer specs and dimensions
chorizo FTM packer specs and dimensions
big scrotum sally FTM packer specs and dimensions
frankfurtor FTM packer specs and dimensions
brotwurst FTM packer specs and dimensions

Packer Bulge Gallery

Each Picture will (in the future, work in progress) be linked to another, more in depth page with many different customers of all skin tones, body types, clothing types wearing each packer. If you'd like to submit packing pics for a DICKScount code, please email packers@grammassausages.com. If we use your pics, you will get a DICKScount code, amount being dependent on number of packers, photo quality, etc. The DICKScount can range anywhere from 10% to a free packer!

Choosing your play item model

Work in Progress - In the meantime,

View all of our play item models:

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